“11. Bring consent out of the bedroom. I think part of the reason we have trouble drawing the line “it’s not okay to force someone into sexual activity” is that in many ways, forcing people to do things is part of our culture in general. Cut that shit out of your life. If someone doesn’t want to go to a party, try a new food, get up and dance, make small talk at the lunchtable—that’s their right. Stop the “aww c’mon” and “just this once” and the games where you playfully force someone to play along. Accept that no means no—all the time.”—Holly over at The Pervocracy with an excellent 101 post on Consent Culture. Read the whole thing.
“You are going to not going to connect with many people. Rejection/lack of connection is the default setting. It feels different to be passed over by a stranger than it is to be turned down by someone you’ve been pining for after you’ve made a grand gesture. You’re giving the person in the second (overly-invested) scenario WAY too much power over your happiness and forgetting that they get to make a snap judgment.”—CaptainAwkward;Question #162: Bad teeth and other dating dealbreakers.
“You bring a bag of homemade cookies to the beach, or make your best friend’s birthday cake, and people will coo “You made that?” in a way that they never do for people who do mundane things like fix cars or birth babies. You will be a Nobel Prize winner, a computer programmer, a rock star.”—Aisha Tyler; Swerve: Reckless Observations of a Postmodern Girl